A message to the Prime Minister: it’s time to fix the CMS

Following last night’s BBC Panorama investigation into the Child Maintenance Service, Both Parents Matter’s CEO –  Sam Morfey – has recorded a message to Andy Burnham, the new Prime Minister, calling for urgent action to address the serious concerns raised by paying parents.

Our own 2026 survey found that:

🔴 79.1% of paying parents who had dealt with the CMS said it had negatively affected their mental wellbeing.

🔴 70.2% said their child maintenance payments were unfair.

🔴 73.1% said their payments were either unaffordable or placed them under financial strain.

These figures, alongside the experiences highlighted in Panorama, demonstrate the need for a CMS that is fair, transparent, accountable and properly recognises the circumstances of both parents.

We’re calling on the Prime Minister to listen to paying parents and take action to fix a system that too many families feel is failing them.

Panorama: Child Maintenance – Parents Under Pressure is available here:
Man sat with head in hands

New findings from Both Parents Matter’s 2026 survey reveal widespread dissatisfaction among paying parents with the Child Maintenance Service (CMS), with many respondents describing a system they believe is unfair and detrimental to their mental health.

The human cost of dealing with the CMS

Almost four in five (79.1%) respondents who had interacted with the CMS said it had negatively affected their mental wellbeing. Nearly half (47.2%) described the impact as very negative, while a further 31.9% said it was somewhat negative. The figures demonstrate the extent to which child maintenance disputes and interactions with the CMS can become a source of prolonged stress for separated parents. Parents can find themselves having to repeatedly explain their circumstances, challenge decisions, provide information and deal with assessments they believe are incorrect or unfair. For parents already dealing with the difficulties of separation and maintaining relationships with their children, the experience can become a significant additional  source of pressure.

The costs of maintaining a relationship with children

Financial pressure is also widespread. 31.0% said their payments were unaffordable, while a further 42.1% said they were affordable only by putting some or considerable strain on their finances. Overall, 73.1% therefore reported that maintenance was either unaffordable or financially burdensome. Our survey also revealed the wider financial commitments faced by paying parents trying to stay involved in their children’s lives. These include the cost of travelling to see children, accommodation, contact centres, food, activities, clothing and holidays.

57.8% reported spending at least £100 a month on costs associated with maintaining contact with their children, while 32.5% reported spending £500 or more.

Similarly, 76.7% reported spending at least £100 a month on the costs of parenting their children, with 37.5% spending £500 or more.

These costs are additional to child maintenance payments and legal costs. The figures reinforce the concern that the financial circumstances of the parents and the child cannot be understood simply by looking at the paying parent’s income and the amount of child maintenance paid.

A widespread perception that the system gets it wrong

The survey results also show a strong perception among paying parents that the financial outcome of the system does not reflect the wider circumstances of their families. 70.2% of paying parents do not consider their child maintenance payments to be fair, compared with just 17.2% who considered them fair. 63.3% of respondents believed that the other parent was financially better off than they were, including 53.6% who said the other parent was considerably better off.

This does not, in itself, establish that individual CMS assessments are incorrect. However, it demonstrates the strength of the perception among paying parents that the system does not often produce outcomes that are fair and equitable. For an organisation supporting parents to remain actively involved in their children’s lives, this is a significant concern.

When the system becomes part of the problem

The results from the survey raise broader questions about the operation of the CMS and the experience of parents who use it. A statutory service dealing with payments that directly affect parents’ ability to support themselves and maintain relationships with their children needs to command confidence from both paying and receiving parents. Instead, our research shows a large majority of paying parents who believe their assessments are unfair, alongside an overwhelming majority reporting a negative impact on their mental health.

These findings suggest that many paying parents perceive the CMS as a system that is not simply difficult to deal with, but one that can itself become a significant source of financial and emotional distress.

We are calling for greater transparency, accountability and fairness in the operation of the CMS, together with a proper recognition of the circumstances and continuing role of both parents.

We are calling for the Government to revisit its decision not to make changes to the current calculation system, which perpetuates conflict, militates against shared parenting, is unaffordable for so many and which is an outlier in the western world.

The objective of child maintenance should be to ensure that children are properly supported by both parents. A system that leaves large numbers of parents feeling unfairly treated, financially pressured and deeply distressed risks undermining confidence in that objective.

Child maintenance should support children without unnecessarily creating conflict and distress between parents. When almost four in five parents say their experience with the CMS has harmed their mental wellbeing, policymakers need to take a serious look at how the system is operating in practice.

The survey does not establish that individual CMS assessments are incorrect, but it provides clear evidence of a strong perception among respondents that the system is unfair, financially stressful and damaging to wellbeing.

About the survey

The findings are from the Both Parents Matter 2026 survey – Experiences of Separated Parents and reflect the experiences and views of respondents. They should not be taken as necessarily representative of all paying parents or all CMS cases.

Dad with three sons in dinghy

Father of three, Dave* shares his personal story of the challenges he faced maintaining a relationship with his three sons after separation.

When Clare* and I separated, I never imagined that simply spending time with my three sons would become such a struggle.

At first, things seemed manageable. I saw my boys, then aged 10, 12 and 14, every weekend. But before long, Clare wanted to change things. She felt she was carrying the burden of school runs, homework, routines and responsibilities during the week, while I enjoyed the more relaxed weekends. Wanting to be fair, I agreed to reduce my time with the boys to every other weekend.

I soon wished I hadn’t. Over the following year, contact with my sons became increasingly unpredictable. Weekends that had been agreed suddenly disappeared. Sometimes Clare would say she had made other plans for the boys. Other times she would admit she was angry with me and didn’t want me to see them.

As disagreements between us became more frequent, I found myself living in a constant state of anxiety, worrying as each contact weekend approached whether I would even get to see them.

On several occasions, I was already on my way to collect the boys when a text message arrived cancelling the visit. Holidays we had agreed in advance were disrupted when one or more of the children were suddenly withheld. Decisions about education, activities and other important aspects of their lives were increasingly made without me. Family events on Clare’s side were routinely prioritised, while my family’s opportunities to create memories with my sons were pushed aside. I couldn’t even be sure of seeing them on Father’s Day, my birthday or at Christmas.

I tried repeatedly to improve the situation. I wanted a cooperative co-parenting relationship and attempted to discuss practical solutions. Instead, every conversation seemed to end in an argument, followed by further restrictions on my time with the children. As months passed, I became increasingly fearful that I would lose my relationship with my sons altogether.

Dad with three sons in dinghy

 

Feeling desperate, I turned to Both Parents Matter. Walking into my first London branch meeting was emotional. I was saddened to discover how many other fathers were facing similar, and often far worse, situations. But I was also encouraged because for the first time in a long while I was surrounded by people who understood what I was going through and who could offer practical advice, knowledge and support.

With the charity’s guidance, I began the difficult process of securing a formal arrangement for time with my children. I had hoped to avoid court, but it soon became clear that without legal protection my relationship with my sons remained vulnerable.  I applied for an order that would give me a weeknight stay between weekends, protected time during school holidays, and clear arrangements for birthdays, Christmas and other important occasions – including Father’s Day.

Initially, Clare opposed every aspect of the application. But shortly before the hearing she agreed to most of the proposals. The magistrates approved the remaining elements in court, giving the boys and me the certainty we had lacked for years. For the first time since the separation, our time together was protected.

Sadly, the court order did not magically solve everything. Clare breached the order on numerous occasions, refused to share travel responsibilities between our homes, and continued making important decisions without consulting me. She often treated seeing their father as optional rather than encouraging the boys’ relationship with me. For a period, my eldest son stopped visiting altogether.

But with the ongoing support of Both Parents Matter and my new partner, I refused to give up and slowly things began to change. The boys grew older and increasingly turned to me for guidance, support and advice. What had once felt like an uphill battle gradually became a more natural and secure bond.

Today, all three of my sons are young adults with independent relationships with me. I remain an important part of their lives and am looking forward to spending Father’s Day with them all.

The struggle that once consumed so much of my energy now feels firmly in the past. In a remarkable reflection of how far things have come, Clare recently contacted me to thank me for being such a good father and to tell me how pleased she was that, despite everything, things had worked out well.

I know that without Both Parents Matter, this story could have had a very different outcome. I am also very aware that there isn’t a happy ending for every separated family, and that many children sadly lose the opportunity to have a loving relationship with both parents. That’s why I remain a Both Parents Matter member and supporter to this day.

*Names have been changed for anonymity

silhouette of people walking through airport walkway

A historic improvement in the legal protection against the horror of international child abduction was made when the Crime and Policing Bill completed its passage through parliament in April 2026.

Both Parents Matter is proud to have been among the organisations that lodged evidence with parliament, contributing to this watershed in child protection.

The new legislation renders every international child abduction subject to criminal sanction, whereas previously there was no meaningful criminal-law deterrent.

In recent years, shockingly, more than 500 British children have been abducted per annum. A significant factor has been the well-known ‘Nicolaou loophole’. This is where abductors removing children permanently from the UK, without the legal right to do so, could evade criminal justice by claiming they only planned a short trip across the border. Prosecutors needed to prove premeditation (before leaving the UK) for permanent removal of the children. Never intended by legislators, this loophole rendered the original 1984 Child Abduction Act unenforceable in the vast majority of cases.

‘International child abduction’ refers to the offence when a child is removed from the UK unlawfully, without the necessary consent of parents, guardians or the court. Sometimes the perpetrator is one parent acting unilaterally in conflict with other family members including the other parent. This is extremely harmful to the child and wider family, when loving family relationships are forcibly eliminated, and the child is taken beyond the reach of UK courts and support services. Child abduction is a serious act that severely and significantly harms children, with typical cases considered child abuse.

Both Parents Matter formed a Child Abduction Support Group in 2022. We have witnessed first-hand the agony of many families affected by child abduction, which has been rife in the absence of a criminal law deterrent. There have been cases of high-conflict parents dissatisfied with outcomes of UK family court proceedings taking the law into their hands, leaving the UK with the child in breach of court orders.

Both Parents Matter shared case studies from our Child Abduction Support Group with Members of Parliament, evidencing the harm caused by abduction and the role the loophole has played in enabling this harm.

This historic strengthening of the 1984 Child Abduction Act also aligns the law in Northern Ireland with the rest of the UK, creating robust UK-wide protection.

Sam Morfey, CEO of Both Parents Matter said:

“Some of the most distressing cases we have been involved with developed into international child abduction. Unlawful removal of a child from the UK, unilaterally by one parent to the complete exclusion of the other parent and other connections in the child’s life, has appalling consequences.

Since forming a specialist support group for child abduction, the loophole preventing legal deterrence has become a glaring and severe concern for our charity. We are delighted to see this legislation passed, supported by the case studies shared by some families we have supported.”

Joel Lindop, chair of Both Parents Matter’s Child Abduction Support Group, himself the father of two children who were abducted and permanently disappeared, said:

“Through the many child abduction cases I have come into contact with, and the case of my own children, I know only too well the harm caused by child abduction. Raised awareness of the newly effective criminal-law deterrent presents the realistic prospect of far fewer children being abducted in the first place. Even where parents are in conflict, provided they remain in the UK, with court involvement children can and do enter settled arrangements enabling enduring, precious, nurturing relationships with both sides of their families.

For many of those affected by international child abduction, who may never see their own children again, there is meaningful consolation in the possibility that sharing our stories may contribute to steps such as this one, so that other families in future may be spared this suffering.”

Teertha Gupta KC (a leading expert in international family law) and Lewis Power KC (a leading expert in international criminal law), who supported preparation of the evidence to parliament, have said:

“The crime of international child abduction is about as heinous as it gets. This new law will be a welcome deterrent and help foreign police forces actively assist the British police and the victims (left behind parents and the children themselves) in a far more effective way than has hitherto been possible.”

Caroline Korah (Head of Family, Vardags), who advised on the preparation of evidence, said:

“Parental child abduction is not a private family matter; it is a form of child abuse that causes lasting trauma. This legislation is a significant moment in child protection; it provides a criminal law deterrent to prevent the horror and agony experienced by too many families each year. It prioritises a child’s right to a stable and meaningful relationship with both parents, over the exploitation of legal gaps when children are taken.”

Could you get involved and help Make May Matter?

This May, we’re asking our amazing supporters to come together and Make May Matter for families going through separation.

Every day, Both Parents Matter supports parents who are facing some of the most difficult moments of their lives — from losing contact with their children to navigating a complex and often overwhelming family court system. Many feel isolated, unheard, and at breaking point.

That’s where you come in.

We would love it if you could take on your own fundraising challenge next month. It can be anything you like from a sponsored Beard shave to a bake sale at work. Whatever you decide to do, your fundraising this May will help us be there for more families when they need it most.

Join the May Movement

We’re bringing all our incredible fundraising efforts together in one place this May to celebrate the amazing people stepping up for Both Parents Matter.

We already have supporters organising their own bike rides and boxing matches, and three of our intrepid trustees will be tackling a combined Three Peaks Challenge!

Whether you plan your own event or support others, you’re part of something bigger this May. On our dedicated Just Giving page you can set up your own fundraiser (click on the orange ‘Start Fundraising button) or donate to the campaign or one of our fundraisers.

With you every step of the way

Front cover of fundraising pack

Both Parents Matter Community Fundraising Pack

We’re here to support you every step, pedal, or cake of the way!

You can download our Fundraising Pack packed with ideas and tips to help make your event a success, or get in touch with our fundraiser, Naomi at fundraising@bothparentsmatter.org.uk for friendly advice and guidance.

We also have branded t-shirts, flags, and collection boxes available to help you promote your event and boost your fundraising.

Let’s Make May Matter

Together, we can raise vital funds, change lives, and ensure more children can maintain meaningful relationships with both parents and their wider family.

 

When Parliament considers reforms to family law—particularly those affecting children—one would expect rigorous scrutiny, balanced evidence, and properly tested assumptions. Yet, as Clause 17 of the Courts and Tribunals Bill progresses, a deeply concerning reality emerges:

The repeal of the presumption of parental involvement is advancing without a single witness formally called to oppose it. That is not a minor procedural gap. It goes directly to the integrity of the legislative process.

What Clause 17 Actually Does

Clause 17 proposes to remove the statutory presumption—introduced in 2014—that a child benefits from the involvement of both parents in their life, unless there is evidence to the contrary.

This presumption has always been carefully qualified:

  • It is rebuttable where there is any risk of harm
  • It does not override the welfare principle
  • Courts already retain full discretion to restrict or prevent contact

In short, it is not a rigid rule—it is a starting point.

The Government’s stated intention is to move away from what it characterises as a “pro-contact culture” and to ensure that safety is prioritised. But removing a presumption is not a technical adjustment. It is a fundamental shift in how the system frames parenthood after separation.

A One-Sided Evidence Base

The parliamentary scrutiny process—based on the published witness list—reveals a striking imbalance.

Oral evidence has been drawn overwhelmingly from:

  • Domestic abuse advocacy organisations
  • Legal practitioners aligned with safeguarding reform
  • Campaigners critical of the current framework

What is notably absent:

  • No organisations representing shared parenting
  • No academic defence of the presumption as a welfare safeguard
  • No structured evidence from those working with non-resident parents
  • No direct challenge to the assumptions underpinning repeal

This matters. Parliament is designed to test competing arguments, not simply to validate a single narrative.

Legislating on the basis of unchallenged evidence is not robust scrutiny—it is policy-making in an echo chamber.

What the Government’s Own Evidence Previously Found

The current justification for repeal becomes even more difficult to sustain when set against the Government’s own findings.

Started under the previous Conservative administration, but concluded under this one, a detailed review of the presumption examined whether it had led to harmful outcomes.

It concluded:

  • There was no evidence that the presumption itself was harmful to children or that repealing it would do any harm
  • But that the presumption should be repealed to tackle what activists have termed a “pro-contact” culture in the courts which might cause harm, despite the review providing no evidence of such a culture existing nor of any harm resulting.

This is a critical contradiction.

The central rationale now being advanced—that the presumption distorts decision-making and risks harm—was not supported by the Government’s own analysis.

In any evidence-led system, such a shift would require new, compelling data. That case has not been clearly made.

Why the Presumption Matters

The presumption of parental involvement serves as a normative anchor within family law. It does not force unsafe contact. It does not override judicial discretion. Instead, it establishes a simple but important principle:

Where it is safe, children benefit from meaningful relationships with both parents.

This principle influences:

  • Judicial starting points
  • Parental expectations
  • The tone and direction of proceedings

Removing it does not create neutrality—it removes a counterbalance within an already complex and adversarial system.

In a jurisdiction frequently criticised for delay, inconsistency, and subjectivity, the loss of such a guiding principle risks increasing uncertainty rather than reducing it.

The Risk of Policy by Narrative

There is no doubt that tragic cases have played a powerful role in shaping the current reform agenda. These cases deserve attention, accountability, and where necessary, systemic improvement.

But public policy must be grounded in system-wide evidence, not driven primarily by exceptional circumstances.

The key question remains insufficiently examined:

Is the issue the existence of the presumption—or failures in how risk is assessed and managed?

The Government’s earlier findings suggest the latter.

Yet instead of addressing practice—training, evidential standards, consistency—the response has been to remove the principle itself.

Without opposing evidence presented to Parliament, this distinction has not been properly tested.

A Missing Voice in Parliament

Perhaps the most striking feature of this reform is not simply what is being proposed—but who has not been heard.

No witness appears to have been called to argue that:

  • Children benefit from safe, ongoing relationships with both parents
  • The presumption provides stability in contested proceedings
  • The system must address misuse, delay, and evidential imbalance—not just contact outcomes

This absence is not incidental. It creates the impression of policy formed within a closed evidential loop, rather than through the adversarial scrutiny Parliament is designed to provide.

Conclusion: Reform Requires Balance, Not Silence

Clause 17 represents one of the most significant shifts in family law in a generation.

Reform may well be necessary. Safeguards must be robust. Failures must be addressed.

But the removal of a long-standing legal presumption—particularly one the Government itself previously found neither harmful nor misapplied at a systemic level—demands the highest standard of scrutiny.

That standard has not been met.

A reform of this magnitude should not proceed on the basis of uncontested evidence and untested assumptions. The stakes—measured in children’s lives—are simply too high.

Crucially, repeal without replacement creates a vacuum. Without a more balanced and structured reform—such as the introduction of a Parental Relationship Test, explicitly assessing each parent’s role in supporting a child’s relationship with the other—this change risks doing more harm than good.

In the absence of such balance, the likely consequences are clear:

  • Increased inconsistency in decision-making
  • Greater conflict between parents
  • The erosion of meaningful parental relationships

These are not abstract risks. They carry profound consequences for children—and for society as a whole.

A reform intended to protect children must not inadvertently undermine the relationships that, in most cases, sustain them.

Two reindeer

We’re very excited to let you know that Both Parents Matter has been selected to participate in the Big Give Christmas Challenge…

That means that every donation made to our campaign via BigGive.org during the week of 2-9 December will be doubled. That’s right – DOUBLED.

So whatever you can give, no matter the size, every donation will make double the difference in supporting us to help families going through parental separation and help more children keep in touch with both parents.

Our campaign launches at 12 noon on Tuesday 2nd December and any donation made via this link until 12 noon on Tuesday 9th December will be doubled:
https://donate.biggive.org/campaign/a05WS000005AjXHYA0

Please note you will be unable to donate via the above link until 12noon on Tuesday 2nd December. Only donations made via this link will be doubled (please don’t donate via our usual Both Parents Matter donation page).

Thank you so much for your support!

hands protecting family figures

Few cases have shaken the public’s conscience more than that of Jack and Paul Sykes, two young boys murdered by their father, David Sykes, in 2014. Their mother, Claire Throssell, has since become an extraordinary advocate for change — determined that no child should suffer as hers did. Her courage, and her campaign for family court reform, deserve nothing but respect and compassion.

But as the government moves to repeal the presumption of parental involvement, we must pause and ask: is it really the presumption that failed — or was it the system entrusted to protect children?

Because in the case of David Sykes, it was not the law that endangered those boys. It was poor risk assessment, systemic failure by Cafcass, and judicial blindness to warning signs. Removing the presumption will not fix that; it risks creating a new problem entirely — where safe, loving parents are cut out of their children’s lives without cause or recourse.

 

What the Presumption Really Means

The “presumption of parental involvement” — enshrined in the Children and Families Act 2014 — simply means this:

It is presumed that a child’s welfare is best served by the involvement of both parents, unless such involvement would put the child at risk of harm.

That final clause — unless there is a risk of harm — is the safeguard. It is the legal line that protects children from dangerous parents while ensuring that safe, loving parents remain part of their children’s lives. It is not a guarantee of contact. It is not a father’s right or a mother’s privilege. It is a child’s right to the love and care of both parents where safe.

When professionals apply the law correctly, it protects children. When they don’t — when Cafcass fails to assess risk, when judges ignore red flags — tragedy can follow. That is what happened to Jack and Paul.

The presumption did not kill them. Negligence did.

 

The Case of David Sykes: A Failure of Safeguarding

David Sykes should never have been granted contact. His history of abuse, coercion, and control was known. Claire Throssell raised repeated warnings. Yet the system — the professionals tasked with protecting children — failed to act with the necessary caution.

Five hours of unsupervised contact were permitted. Within those hours, two children lost their lives.

This was not a failure of legislation but of implementation. The same professionals who could misapply the presumption will still misjudge risk even after its repeal. Removing the presumption changes the paperwork, not the practice.

Without better training, supervision, accountability, and culture within Cafcass and the courts, no legislative reform will save children like Jack and Paul.

 

The Other Side: When the Presumption Was Absent

To understand the risk of abolishing the presumption, we must also look at the case of 10-year-old Sara Shariff.

Sara was murdered in 2023 by her father and stepmother in Woking, Surrey. Her mother, Olga Shariff, had been systematically excluded from her daughter’s life. She raised concerns, wrote to authorities, pleaded to see her child — and was repeatedly ignored.

There was no presumption of parental involvement protecting Sara’s relationship with her mother. There were no “extra loving sets of eyes” to watch over her.

Had that safeguard been there — had her mother’s voice been recognised and her involvement presumed to be in her daughter’s best interests — Sara might still be alive today.

This is the other tragic face of family court failure: not when unsafe parents are granted contact, but when safe parents are shut out. Both stem from the same root problem — professional misjudgement, lack of training, and institutional bias — not from the law itself.

 

A Balanced System, Not a Broken One

Abolishing the presumption risks turning the clock back to an era when one parent — usually the non-resident one — can be erased from a child’s life by default. That is not progress. That is harm by omission.

The solution is not to remove the principle that children benefit from two loving parents. It is to ensure that the wrong parents don’t get through the gate — that Cafcass and the courts are equipped to distinguish between the genuinely dangerous and the genuinely loving.

We need:

  • Better risk assessments — mandatory, evidence-based, and independently verified.
  • Cafcass reform — officers must be trained to identify coercive control, but also to recognise when allegations are used manipulatively.
  • Judicial accountability — decisions that lead to harm should trigger automatic review.
  • Transparency and data — so systemic patterns of error are identified and corrected.

 

Two Tragedies, One Lesson

Jack and Paul Sykes remind us what happens when abusive parents are allowed access they should never have had.

Sara Shariff reminds us what happens when loving parents are excluded when they should have been there.

The thread running through both cases is not the presumption. It is institutional failure to protect the child’s welfare through sound judgement, evidence, and courage.

If we remove the presumption entirely, we will not prevent another Jack and Paul — we may simply create more Saras.

 

In Memory and in Resolve

We can and must hold both truths: to mourn deeply for the loss of Claire Throssell’s sons, and to respect her determination to prevent other children suffering. But we must also insist that reform must be based on evidence, not reaction.

The presumption of parental involvement — applied correctly — is a child-safety mechanism, not a threat. It recognises that children flourish when they have access to two safe, loving parents — and that safeguarding, not ideology, should determine when that bond is broken.

We owe it to Jack, Paul, and Sara to get this right — not by scrapping the principles that protect children, but by fixing the systems that keep failing them.

 

Paul O’Callaghan

Chair, Both Parents Matter